Introducing: Pacman!

Why, hello there.

So I seemingly fell off the face of the Earth during the last couple of months or so. I had every intention to blog, continue projects and catch up with people. However, being heavily pregnant and therefore one mega moody whale of a woman, I let a lot of things slide - first to go was any interactions with the outside world.

But! We are here now, and there is someone I'd like you to meet.

PACMAN.

Who will be known as "Ash" from now on.

Side note: I don't believe I ever told you why he had the nickname of 'Pacman' in the first place. One night at the dinner table, Boo was interrogating Benji and I over details of how the whole baby thing works. One gem she said was "is it in your tummy floating around and eating all of the foods?" and he has been Pacman ever since.

First of all, let me just say: yes. Child birth really is THAT painful. I don't know how I managed to forget that. Don't let me fool myself into believing otherwise again, internet, no matter how cute my kid is.

Ash is just two weeks old now and we're all adjusting well. This past fortnight has been one incredible, beautiful, emotional blur full of lessons and blessings.  We have had such amazing support through this transition time, and I can't express my appreciation enough. I would just like to take a second to say a very special thank you to my parents for having Boo both before and after Ash came about, and to the lovely people from church who have been so kind and generous to drop meals around. Absolutely blown away by how thoughtful people are.

Boo is doing really well, and enjoys being a big sister (...most of the time). One darling thing she does is sings "Hey Diddle Diddle" when the baby cries. Apparently her voice is magic or something and will soothe him. It worked once. However, the more Ash is around and cries, the tireder and more exasperated the song sounds. She really is beautiful with him though. 

This guy has been amazing. One proud father and an absolute natural. Benji has spent the past two weeks at home with Boo, Ash and I, and honestly, I could not have asked for a more helpful, supportive partner. I could gush on about this guy for hours, but I will just leave it with this: I am so unbelievably lucky, and thankful, to have such a wonderful, loving husband.

As for me: I'm exhausted! However, surviving each day as it comes and finding blessings among the chaos. Being a mother-of-two is time consuming and mentally draining, and I've been a little concerned about how I'm going to manage when Benji returns to work this week. Yet, I do love life at the moment, and am starting to view each day simply as a challenge to get on top of. 

I'm going to leave this here as it is far too early and I am under-caffeinated. I'm hoping to post more often in the future - just in case you were starting to miss photos of crochet items and cake!

Have a beautiful day xx

Hey Mum - I Get It Now

Mother's Day is just around the corner. It's not something that is heavily celebrated in my family; really, being appreciative of your mother is something that should probably be displayed daily.

I started composing a little list in my mind this morning. In the same vein as mothers day, I'd like to dedicate it to my mother.

Stuff That Drives Me Crazy (That I Just Realised My Mother Probably Had To Put Up With Too)

1. Being yelled at from the other end of the house. 
2. Having to share my shower.
3. Being yelled at from the other end of the house on the rare occasion I do get to shower on my own.
4. Planning something you're so sure your child will enjoy, and on that particular day they show no interest in the activity at all.
5. Answering the same question fifty billion times in five minutes.
6. Answering the same question fifty billion times all over again ten minutes later.
7. The child enjoying food prepared one way, but detesting it another. i.e. corn on the cob vs loose. Potatoes cut up to look like chips vs. potato any other way.
8. Having to look after everyone in the house when they're sick. But when I am sick, a) there is no one to look after me and b) I still have to look after everyone else.
9. My child choosing to ask for something to eat every time I go to the bathroom. Seriously kid, I'm trying to pee.
10. Stalling at bed time.
11. Procrastinating in the morning over getting ready, when the child knows that after they get ready, they can have/do something they want.
12. The fact that we are so very particular about how certain things have to be, yet we are incapable of tidying up our playthings.
13. The fact that 99% of my "coffee dates" with friends now end up in a toy department so we can finish our conversation.
14. Being out of routine means the world is close to ending.
15. The fact that I actually spend my spare time thinking these lists up.

So, thanks mum for putting up with this nonsense from my siblings and I. 

I get it now, we really were pains in the butt.

My Monster

Four years ago I was given one of the greatest blessings I will ever receive.

I'm not really one for seriously sentimental, over-sharing blogging. But today, I might make an exception. Perhaps it's the pregnancy hormones, but I'm feeling quite moved.

Before Boo came along, life was looking very different. I'm not going to go into huge detail, but long story short: I was a mess. Every day was dictated by mental illness, and I honestly could not say where I was headed.

Of course, there were huge doubts about my coping abilities - and I would never, ever recommend parenting as a form of therapy for young people. 

But from the time I discovered I was pregnant, things started to turn around. Nothing has ever been perfect, and nothing ever will be. But I found life again.

Life wrapped up in this little bundle of crazy.

She is crazy and fiery and full of attitude. 

She's loving and thoughtful and compassionate.

She is cheek and laughter and silly.

She is dancing and colour and mess.

In four years, she has taught me so much. 

Patience. Joy. How to love. The importance of family. Letting go. Enjoying simple things. Laughter. How much I can actually do - how far I can go - if I just try.

Don't get me wrong - she drives me absolutely insane. There is no way we have a perfect mother-daughter relationship (because that doesn't exist).

But despite that, I am so thankful to have this little monster.

She's the spark in my world, that little added colour. 

Life would never have turned out so wonderful without her.

Happy Birthday, Miss Boo.

I love you.

Update: Inspiration - I Has It.

Unfortunately, I didn't share any of it with you. Which is very naughty of me.

To make up for that, here's a little insight into some of the things that inspire me.

My Husband.

Beautiful man. Beautiful Mind. 

Boo.

Little ball of energy, joy, and attitude.

Family.

Passion. Brave. Compassion. Thoughtful. Laughter. Love.

Thought Provoking. Dream.

I currently have three - yes, THREE! - projects I would love to explore.

If you have had much to do with me, you will know that I am quite scatterbrained and all over the place. 

So, please: be patient, stay tuned and watch this space. 

I hope to be sharing my thoughts with you very soon. 

In the mean time - take care, be good to each other, and find a decent coffee. 

Life is beautiful.